This story is dedicated to my friend Cullen G. who taught me everything I know about the internet and... all the places I shouldn't go but do:), who took me to all the gay bars in our city, when I first moved there, IN ONE WILD NIGHT. I love you, I miss you and I hope you finally realize how beautiful you are. In case you haven't noticed, I borrowed your name.
By Sol Corazon©
Freshly showered, the short, compact and well built guy entered the bedroom and watched as the kid, God; he couldn’t be more than twenty-one or two, greedily kissed his wife’s pretty pink mouth. The kid was like a machine; he’d fucked them both tirelessly all of last night and was apparently ready for more this morning.
The boy was incredibly good looking with shoulder length, strawberry blond hair and a pair of unbelievable violet eyes he’d thought came courtesy of contacts but had been proven wrong. He was a big boy, 6’2, no probably 6’3 or 4, every long, lean muscular inch of him. There was an enticingly dangerous, hard edge to him.
His set up was pretty cool too. He had a nice basement apartment. It wasn’t in the best neighborhood but it was conveniently close to the bar they’d met him in last night.
When he saw that they weren’t coming up for air, he interrupted, “Um, I couldn’t find a towel.”
Reluctantly ending the moist, open-mouthed kiss he had been exchanging with the man’s petite, curvy wife, Cullen eyed the guy’s naked body lustfully and said, “Why don’t you bring that sweet ass of yours over here and I’ll dry you off with my tongue.”
With a broad smile, the guy, John or was it Jim? complied and eagerly joined the two of them on the bed. He began to play with Cullen’s hair as the boy licked and kissed every drop of wayward moisture he could find. Cullen trailed one hand up….Cindy’s…yeah, it was Cindy and Jim, left thigh and stroked her clitoris gently.
She gasped as Cullen suddenly thrust three fingers forcefully in and out of her moist vagina, while continuing to encircle her clit with his thumb. She raised her knees and spread her legs wider, while continuing to avidly watch Cullen’s mouth moving across her husband’s body.
Jim was softly groaning as Cullen kissed the sensitive skin between his thighs and fondled his engorged penis. Cullen leaned forward and swirled his tongue around the head.
“Suck it,” Jim said.
“Wait,” Cullen ordered.
He looked at Jim out of playful violet eyes, said, “Patience is a virtue,” and then enclosed the glans of Jim’s sturdy penis in his mouth and lashed it with his tongue.
Jim jerked convulsively and exclaimed, “Christ.”
Cullen continued to hold the tip of Jim’s cock in his mouth and began to jerk the shaft up and down skillfully. After a few moments playing with Jim’s cock, Cullen switched his attention to Cindy, wriggling his fingers in her pussy. She rocked on his fingers frantically.
“I want to see you swallow his cock like you did last night.” Cindy said.
Cullen opened his mouth wider and engulfed Jim’s cock inch by excruciating inch. Jim and his wife watched eagerly, unbearably excited by the view of Jim’s hard penis in Cullen’s mouth.
“Oh God, I’m gonna cum,” Cindy shrieked.
Cullen played with Jim’s penis, sucking it gently and leisurely washing over the head with the flat of his tongue, while simultaneously thrusting his fingers towards the bottom of Cindy’s vaginal canal and spreading them wide.
He massaged the soft tissue of her vaginal walls and the smooth, curved hump of her cervix and rubbed against her swollen clit with the palm of his hand. Cindy arched her back and clenched her thighs around his hand.
“Right there, right there,” she cried. “Oh yesssss.”
She climaxed sharply as Cullen continued caressing her hot, wet cunt. When he removed his fingers, she collapsed back onto the bed and turned towards Jim, kissing him hungrily.
Cullen sank his mouth onto Jim’s cock until his lips were touching Jim’s gray and brown pubic hairs. He raised his mouth incrementally until his lips were barely touching the head. Jim groaned with disappointment when Cullen removed his mouth completely.
“Go grab a condom from that drawer over there,” Cullen requested. “The lube’s over there too. I want you to sit on my cock.”
Cullen lay flat on his back.
“C’mere you,” he told Cindy, pointing to his mouth, “sit right here.”
Cindy obeyed rapidly; sitting her pretty brown bush right over Cullen’s waiting lips. He sucked on her clit delicately, moaning into her cunt when he felt Jim’s fingers caressing his cock before applying a condom and lubricating it generously.
Cullen arched up into Jim’s anus when he felt the hot, moist entrance swallowing the tip of his cock, grabbing Cindy’s firm buttocks reflexively and grunting into her pussy. She was grinding her vagina all over Cullen’s face.
“God, that feels so good,” she said between rapid, panting breaths. Jim reached around and pinched her nipples, hard, just the way she liked it and she climaxed again. Jim rose up and down steadily on Cullen’s cock, holding onto Cindy’s shoulders for leverage. His ass was so tight, so hot that Cullen thrust upwards determinedly, trying to capture every sweet rise and fall.
As he turned on the
“Ok?” he asked.
His father nodded.
“I’m going to get the rest of your medicine and bring your breakfast up here.”
His father nodded again and closed his eyes wearily. With gentle, practiced motions, Shannon’s muscular arms lifted his father and plumped the pillows behind him.
Once in the kitchen, he quickly prepared a cup of decaf and several pieces of buttered toast and jelly. He returned to his father’s bedroom just as the breathing treatment was nearing completion. He assisted his father with his medications and set up his breakfast tray so that everything he needed would be within reach.
“I’m going next door to work out with Cullen. The phone is right next to you and don’t forget to put your oxygen back on when you’re done eating.”
His father nodded, a rueful smile on his face.
“Am I acting like I’m your
“Yeah,” his father said in a raspy voice.
He used his key to enter
Cullen’s small basement apartment. He didn’t hear any movement. Assuming Cullen
Shannon stared, transfixed
by the sight of Cullen’s long, thick penis rapidly going in and out of the
guy’s ass. It must have felt good because the guy was moaning and groaning like
crazy. Cullen suddenly noticed
“Stop thinking, stop thinking,” he ordered himself.
Only...he could not get the picture of Cullen’s delicious body out of his head. The way he was moving. Controlled power and grace. Hair dark with sweat. Eyes hot and intense. Those eyes had captured Shannon when he was a kid and never let him go.
“Hey baby, what up?” Cullen asked.
“Nada, man, just waiting on
“Sorry ‘bout that man,” Cullen said, sincerely apologetic. “I didn’t even think to call you. They had to park in the alley. There weren’t any spaces out front last night.”
Noting the tense set of
Concerned, Cullen moved in
His voice trailed off
abruptly. The expression in Shannon’s dark brown eyes took his breath away and
weakened his knees. Never in his life had anyone looked at him like…like they
would die to have him, crawl over broken glass, walk through fire…like
Hunger and desire were emanating from Shannon in waves of heat so intense and tantalizing that Cullen was irresistibly drawn to him. He felt as though he was immersed in white hot fire. Last night might never have happened. His cock was burning with lust. His hands slowly, carefully moved to Shannon’s bare shoulders and pulled him forward.
Shannon was unresisting, defenseless with longing. Almost reluctantly, Cullen’s mouth moved towards Shannon’s. Torn between conflicting emotions, Cullen hesitated but didn’t stop. He had wanted this for too long. His lips touched Shannon’s soft mouth.
Shannon’s lips, full and
soft, felt like heaven. This could not be happening. This was Shannon, best
friend, brother. The sweet sensation of
Cullen’s mind raced feverishly. ‘What the hell am I doing?’
Cullen couldn’t stop himself
now. He could not get enough of the honeyed taste of
Shannon held Cullen’s head
tenderly in his hands, lost in sensation, lost in Cullen. Cullen was grinding
against him hungrily, his erect penis surging against Shannon’s thigh.
“Most beautiful,” Cullen
Over the years, they had grown closer, as the few years between them lost importance. Now, they were best friends, everything to each other. At least, Shannon was everything to him.
It was the strangest thing. Cullen
heard himself think something that he had never before allowed himself to
acknowledge consciously. It was as if time slowed…then stopped. He watched
himself, totally immersed in
He reared back, tore his
mouth away from Shannon’s and watched as Shannon, dazed with arousal, licked
his lips and looked at him out of cloudy eyes. He groaned faintly and leaned
“Is this what you want?” he spat out, voice cold and hard.
“You’re just like all the rest,” he said harshly.
“You want my cock right? ‘Cullen will fuck anything.’ Right?” he finished bitterly.
Stricken and numb,
Cullen stood there,
unwilling to think about what had just happened. He ignored the burning ache in
his stomach, the heavy, unrelenting weight in the center of his chest. He
pulled on a pair of sweat pants and proceeded to complete his workout, just as
he would have done if
The 100 or so feet from
Cullen’s house seemed like miles.
“Yes, Pop, it’s me,”
He inhaled in and released the breath slowly. ‘Hold it together,’ he instructed himself quietly and then called out, “I’ll be up in a sec.”
He bathed and dressed his
father efficiently, automatically following the morning routine they had
established over the many years of his father’s illness. James Wright searched
his son’s drawn face with troubled eyes. He was a handsome man in spite of his
“Everything ok, son?” he
probed, knowing even before he asked that
“I’m sick son, not dumb,” James said, his frustration evident. “I can tell something is wrong,” he continued, beginning to wheeze as his anxiety increased.
“It’s all good. Look, it’s
just school. I have a couple of papers due that I gotta work on and I’m a
little worried about that and my work hours. That’s all,”
James looked intently into
“Don’t protect me,” James
rasped. He grabbed
“You’re a good boy. You know I love you. No matter what. No matter what,” he said again emphatically.
Shannon smiled at him. “Yeah, I know, Pop. I love you too. Look, the phone is right next to you. I put your lunch next to you too. Make sure you drink your water. All of it.”
James rolled his eyes and sighed.
As James sighed again,
Emotion stole his father’s breath, just like death was stealing his life in slow, heartbreaking increments. Their household was a loving one, but eerily quiet most of the time. Every aspect of their family life held an accommodation to his father’s illness.
Maybe that’s why he loved the noisy, boisterous O’Briens. There was crazy life in their house. They had acted like he was one of them from the start. Cullen’s younger brothers, Niall and Quinn, had seen him sitting on his front porch shortly after his family had moved next door to them.
He was four years old, just about to turn five. They had come over to invite him to play with them and he had been absorbed into the family. Peggy, Cullen’s mom, always said that she had fallen in love with him at first sight. ‘I’m gonna have to adopt you,’ had been her first words to him.
An only child, he was fascinated by them. They all looked alike, beautiful, blond haired, blue eyed and of varying complexions due to the different ethnic backgrounds of their fathers. The O’Brien house was the ‘kid house’ and there was always something fun going on there.
Their sexual exploration was fun and playful. They tried just about everything except for anal sex. That didn’t feel right to either one of them. Other than that, they did everything they read and heard about. Niall liked to be tied up. Shannon did it because Niall asked but wasn’t really turned on by it. And he most definitely did not want Niall to do it to him.
Things changed between Shannon and Cullen around this time. Shannon and Niall were on their way to the corner store and encountered Cullen about to leave the house with some of his friends. Niall asked Cullen to come with them.
Cullen had a look of pleased
surprise on his face. Sometimes he was scared that his brothers and sisters
would resent him. He always had to be the disciplinarian of the family. Their
mother was either working or tired from working; it also just was not in
Peggy’s nature to discipline anyone. He looked at
That simple moment held a
Shannon and Niall remained as close as ever. But now, wherever Cullen was, you could be sure to find Shannon. Cullen never became impatient with the adoring twelve year old. Not even when his friends teased him about it.
Cullen would often accuse
After they found a beat up motor bike on the side of the road during one of their searches for merchandise for the flea market and painstakingly restored it to good health, it was Shannon who made them wait until they could save up and take it to a mechanic before they rode it. He also made them wait until they were able to purchase helmets.
Sweet natured Shannon became even more cute and quiet and sweet with each sip of alcohol. As they were walking home, Cullen had looked at him and said musingly, “Sweet sixteen and never been kissed.”
Niall smirked and said, “Oh he’s been kissed. He’s definitely been kissed.”
“Not by me,” Cullen had teased. He pulled Shannon to him and lightly kissed him on the lips. “There you go.”
“Now you really got it bad,” Niall had uttered in a laughing whisper. “C’mon bro. Let’s get your little sweet sixteen ass home.”
If Cullen was not working or in school, he and Shannon were in the basement apartment Peg had fixed up for him on his thirteenth birthday. By that time, Cullen was providing almost as much income to the family as Peg was; he was a hustler. He was too young to actually hold a job, but he always found work he could do and get paid for under the table.
If Cullen were playing, he
would have his lover of the moment park in the front of the house so that
Over the years, Shannon had repeatedly observed Cullen pushing people away when they tried to get too close. Other than his brothers, he had few close friends. Shannon could count them all on one hand. Selena, his mother’s ex-boyfriend, Joaquin and Shannon.
How do you fix it when you have hurt the one person who means everything to you? His mother was constantly telling him, ‘Baby, you are just like me. Heat up fast, cool down fast. But you gotta watch what you say. Words hurt worse than fists.’ His younger brother Niall was the same way: always getting into trouble because of his big mouth.
The real problem was, he
couldn’t understand why he had reacted like that. Touching Shannon was like a
dream. He had never even allowed himself to think of Shannon in that way. Even
that time when he had kissed
After it was over, he had
made himself forget about how sweet it had felt. He’d felt so stupid. The
minute he had said, ‘Sweet sixteen and never been kissed,’ he had realized that
he had been waiting for an excuse to touch
As a matter of fact, when
Every so often, whenever Selena was around the two of them together, Cullen would catch her watching them with a strange look on her face. She would never explain why. She would just ask him, “ Is Shannon still the most beautiful boy you’ve ever seen?” When he would answer with a brief, impatient, “Yes,” she would smile at him mysteriously. Cullen hated that and she would laugh at him when he told her so.
Now, Cullen was living up to
his reputation. When he wasn’t working he was playing. It wasn’t the same. He
had always been driven by an almost insatiable sex drive. He loved to give and
receive pleasure. Now, he was using sex as an anesthetic, to make him forget.
It held very little pleasure. When his mother tried to talk with him about the
very obvious estrangement from
A couple of months drifted
by. Cullen was scared to call
When Cullen did see him, the
grief stricken look on
How could he have said all
of those things? No matter what he was doing, he had flashbacks of the look on
When he was twelve years
old, Cullen had made a vow to never hurt anyone, and to never allow himself to
be hurt, ever again. He remembered
How was he going to fix
this? He didn’t know how to get
The other day, Cullen had
finally realized that
“Hey,” Cullen said softly.
Cullen looked at the space
That night, as was becoming
customary for him, Cullen awakened expecting to find Shannon sleeping next to
him. On many occasions, if it were getting late, instead of going home, Shannon
would sleep over. Tonight Cullen had a dream so vivid that waking up alone
Alone, desolate, in the
dark, at , there was no escaping the very concrete
All of the hurt, all of the misery that he kept trying to run away from, exploded out of him in noisy, racking sobs. Cullen wiped furiously at the tears flowing from his eyes. If he wanted Shannon back in his life, he was going to have to make the first move, the second move, how ever many moves it took to get Shannon to forgive him. He reached for the phone.
“Can you come over now?” Cullen asked in a subdued voice. Stomach fluttering with dread, he couldn’t interpret the silence that seemed to last forever.
After a few moments,
Shannon knocked on the door, unwilling to use his key. Cullen opened the door and said softly, “I gave you that key for a reason.” He reached for Shannon’s hand to pull him inside and dropped his hand awkwardly when Shannon flinched away.
They sat on the small loveseat in the area Cullen liked to call his den.
“I just want,” Cullen
started again. A jolt of fear reverberated through him as
“I can’t talk about it now Cullen.”
Cullen stood up next to him, prepared to prevent him from leaving. “Please, sit down,” Cullen requested.
“I’m sorry,” Cullen apologized. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He stopped, at a loss. Words were so unbelievably inadequate right now.
There was an awkward
silence. Cullen looked at
Cullen looked at
Tense with nerves,
Cullen edged closer to him.
“God, you are so fucking stubborn,” he said gruffly, grabbing
“I can be just as stubborn as you are. I’m not moving ‘til you talk to me or at least look at me.”
They sat there in uneasy silence. Cullen hovered over Shannon, obviously prepared to remain there for as long as it took for Shannon to relent. Sometimes Shannon thought he knew Cullen better than Cullen knew himself. He wasn’t even really mad at Cullen. He had known how Cullen would react if he ever showed him how he really felt. He just didn’t know if he could handle being so close to Cullen now and pretend that he didn’t have those feelings. But, he didn’t think he could let Cullen go. He had been dead without him. After an eternity, he pushed at Cullen, “Alright, you idiot, get off me.”
Cullen was weak with relief. “No,” he taunted. “I’m just getting comfortable. I think I’ll stay here.”
“I don’t know about you,”
They settled into Cullen’s bed. Exhausted, after so many nights of being unable to sleep, Shannon drifted off immediately, feeling comforted by Cullen’s presence.
Cullen lay there quietly, too
relieved and full of conflicting emotions to sleep. He slept off and on,
awakening once to find Shannon curled around him. Slowly, gently, cautiously,
he leaned forward and kissed
Later the next evening when
“I remember” Shannon said. “How could I ever forget? The first time I saw him I thought he was trying to kill you.” He conjured the memory of Joaquin slashing at Cullen with a knife and Cullen’s determination to avoid the blade. He had been scared to death until Niall reassured him that it was ‘just practice.’
“Well, when Joaquin left, we were all so miserable. Mom was totally fucked up, the younger kids didn’t really get it, they were just miserable because we were.” Cullen paused, not really sure if he wanted to continue. Shannon remained quiet, listening intently.
“Joaquin was the only father I knew. When he moved in with Mom, I had just started school. I was the only white kid in the class and my mom was living with a Mexican. So, I was constantly getting my ass kicked.”
Cullen stopped for a minute.
He hated to think about it. Hated to talk about it, even though it was
“The first couple of times it happened, he didn’t say anything. The third time, I came home with blood everywhere. I tried to get myself cleaned up so my mom wouldn’t find out. Joaquin came to my room while I was taking all of my clothes off.
He just looked at me, like he was trying to figure me out. Finally, he said, ‘You too pretty ain’t chu? That’s why chu getting you ass kicked, anh Cullen?’ His accent was pretty strong then and I could barely understand him.”
Cullen laughed wryly. “I got a little mad. I wanted to say to him, you’re just as pretty as I am. I thought he was making fun of me.”
“Then he said, ‘Cullen, I teach chu, I teach chu to fight man. So you can kick all dos li’l mudder fuckers in da ass.’ He taught me everything, how important it was to take care of my brothers and sisters. How they would watch everything I’d do. And how not to be like him. Drinking all the time. Getting in trouble all the time.
When he left, I promised myself that I would never, ever, hurt anyone like he hurt me and my mom.”
Cullen paused again, unable to remain detached from childhood memories that still held amazing power. He continued, voice harsh, “I couldn’t understand how he could leave us like that. Not just me, but how he could just up and leave his own kids like that.
I didn’t understand then that he was an alcoholic. But that’s the reason I hardly ever drink. I remember all the fights they had when I was younger. All of the fucked up things he said and did when he was drunk.
He’s a completely different person now that he has cleaned his act up. And he’s sorry for all the things he did. But you know, sorry don’t ever make it better. No matter how sorry you are.”
He looked at
“Anyway, when he left, he and mom were so angry at each other, I thought I was never going to see him again, ever. It was like losing my father all over again. Even though I don’t have any memory of losing my father. I was too young. I can’t explain it. It’s like them leaving meant, that I was nothing, of no importance at all.”
“It’s ok, Shannon said softly. “I kinda understand. I don’t know what its like to lose a father, because even with my father being so sick, he is still here. I do understand what its like to be afraid to lose someone. I live with that every day. I really don’t know how Pop does it. Sometimes, I think, if that was me, I would just kill myself rather that live like that,” he confessed in a hushed voice.
“Everyday I thank God that he doesn’t, that he’s stronger than I would ever be. The promise I made to myself, is not to ever let him know how much I hate seeing him like this. How much I hate having to give him his medicine, having to wash him and dress him like he is my kid, instead of him being the dad. I hate myself for that sometimes.”
Cullen looked at
“Me too,” Shannon said. “I mean, you know what I mean,” he said.
Over the next few months, they both tread carefully. Each was unwilling to do anything to upset the precarious balance of their friendship. They settled back into their usual routines of work and school and spending most of their time together.
The one time things had
almost fallen apart again, they had just finished working out in the gym.
Cullen had grabbed Shannon and put him in a headlock. They hadn’t wrestled in
They had grappled for
control, rolling around on the floor until Cullen had pinned him. He had looked
“I should keep you like this,” he teased softly.
Cullen rested his full
It felt so good. Only the memory of Shannon’s face during the months of their separation prodded him to his feet. Cullen jumped up, breathing heavily, cock hard and engorged beneath his sweats.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he repeated huskily.
Unable to speak beyond the flood of lust that had poured through him, Shannon closed his eyes, attempting to regain control. When he opened them, Cullen was leaning over him and holding a hand out. There was an electrifying moment of sizzling awareness between them as their hands touched.
“I’m not a kid anymore,”
“Think about it. I’m going to go check on my father and then take a shower. I’ll be back later.”
Later, they both acted like nothing had happened.
A few days later, Cullen
walked into the exercise room to find that
Cullen observed his graceful movements, mesmerized by the shifting interplay of Shannon’s muscles as he moved. He licked suddenly dry lips and walked over to him. As he trailed a hand slowly across Shannon’s back, he said, “You’re wet,” in hushed tones.
Shannon tensed and the hairs on the back of his neck rose. He closed his eyes.
“Yeah,” he said. “Thought I’d get a head start.”
“You’re so….wet,” Cullen
said again, hoarsely. He raised his fingers to his mouth and licked his fingers
“You taste good,” Cullen said softly while slowly leaning forward and capturing a rolling bead of sweat with the tip of his tongue.
Cullen touched Shannon’s mouth with two fingers. “Shhhh…don’t think.”
Cullen replaced his fingers
with his mouth and rubbed lightly across
“Don’t think,” Cullen whispered softly. “Just let me touch you. Just for a minute. I just need to touch you.”
Cullen licked and bit and
Shannon made a low sound of
encouragement and Cullen groaned. Shannon’s hands moved caressingly up Cullen’s
arms, across his back and then to his hair. The feel of the silken strands of
Cullen’s hair between his fingers turned
Gasping for breath and fighting
for control, Cullen tore his mouth away from
“God, Shannon, please don’t stop me now. Please,” Cullen begged hoarsely, aching with longing.
Cullen froze in place, his muscles
aching with tension, cock straining against his sweats. His biggest game of
all, played on himself. Pretending that things could be like before. That he
didn’t want to be doing this. He waited an eternity and then felt
“You smell so good.”
Hungry and impatient, without
warning, Cullen engulfed
“Oh my God,”
“Cullen,” he said through clenched teeth. “I need to cum. I need to cum right now. I can’t wait.”
Cullen looked up at him while he leisurely licked his cock up and down. Shannon reached out with both hands. Cullen grabbed his wrists and held them to both sides of his body.
Voice husky with desire,
“Soon,” Cullen promised. “I just want to taste you. You taste so good.”
He leaned forward and surrounded just the head with his moist lips and sucked softly, forcefully. Shannon bit his lip and lifted his hips. Cullen removed his mouth from Shannon’s penis.
“You promised,” he chided,
looking up at
Cullen opened his mouth wide
and hovered over the top of
Obediently, Cullen engulfed
Cullen was shaking with
desire. He was aroused beyond belief at the taste of
“Still want to cum?” he
“Wait,” Cullen ordered. “And don’t move or I’ll stop.”
He grasped the shaft of
He stopped and then looked
“Still?” Cullen asked.
“You still wanna cum
“What?” Cullen teased.
Boneless, Shannon slid to
the floor. His hips were rocking back and forth and he was making that noise
again. Relentless, Cullen grabbed
“Not yet,” Cullen said, taking his mouth away.
Unable to withstand the
sweet torment any longer,
“Just a little more,” Cullen groaned.
Cullen leaned over and took
Cullen was right on the edge after teasing them both for so long.
“Now you can cum for me.”
Cullen lowered his mouth
Shannon’s penis erupted with a series of convulsive jerks, releasing thick, creamy, copious jets of cum into Cullen’s hot, wet mouth. Cullen swallowed hungrily, out of his mind with desire, squeezing and jerking his cock rapidly. His cock surged wildly in his hand, releasing endless streams of cum as he moaned and groaned his pleasure and release around Shannon’s sweet cock in his mouth.
Before Shannon could drift off to sleep, Cullen helped him to his feet and led him to the bed. Shannon’s face was relaxed with satisfaction. Cullen was turning on again as he recalled Shannon’s excitement and how gratifying it had been to please him.
Cullen caressed the side of
Things could be just like before, only better. This is gonna be easy.
“This is gonna be easy,”
Cullen slanted a glance at
him. Just as he was thinking, ‘This should keep
Rising up on an elbow, he laughed wryly at Cullen’s amazed stare. Simultaneously, amused and angry, he assured Cullen, “I’m not psychic, man. I’ve just seen that look on your face a thousand times, whenever you tried to talk me into going along with some wild ass scheme of yours. You don’t want me to start naming them do you?”
Cullen eyed him sourly. “Not really, no.”
Shannon’s face lost all traces of amusement and turned solemn. “You were right Cullen. I am just like all the rest.” Remembered hurt appeared in his brown eyes. I do want this.” He grasped Cullen’s cock.
“I didn’t mean…” Cullen began hastily.
“Let’s keep it real,”
For a moment, Cullen just stared at him, violet eyes wide and troubled. He was scared. His heart pounded violently in his chest and for a moment he felt like the kid whose world had just been turned upside down. He looked at Shannon, ready to promise anything. ‘Don’t leave me.’ He thought he had said it out loud. God.
“Wait” Shannon said as Cullen’s mouth opened. “Please, just think about it. Don’t make promises you can’t keep. He swallowed. “If you want, you will always be my friend. I just can’t do the fuck buddy thing with you. This means something to me, Cullen. When you touch me…,” he paused for a second, unable to continue. “I love you. I love you sooo much.”
Cullen was silent for long moments. “I’m scared,” he confessed softly.
There was a startled silence on the other end.
“Um, yeah, I guess,” Cullen stuttered.
“I’ll pick you up at 7.”
Cullen’s brother Quinn was very close to him in size, so Cullen borrowed something to wear from him. Quinn was the dresser in the family. He was planning on being a businessman. He was a whiz with money and Cullen let him handle the budget and anything to do with the family money. Cullen and the rest of his brothers spent their free time in jeans and t-shirts.
“Hot date tonight?” Quinn teased, dark blue eyes glinting with amusement. He stared in astonishment as hot color filled Cullen’s face.
Keeping a straight face with great difficulty, Quinn helped Cullen select an outfit. “You definitely could not have done this without me,” Quinn said frankly. “Thank God I was here.” He ran out of the room at Cullen’s threatening motions towards him.
At exactly, his sister Niamh opened the door to Cullen’s basement apartment and called out, “Cullen, your date is here.”
“Your date’s here,” Niamh yelled impatiently. “Come up here.”
Cullen shot Quinn a dirty look. Quinn smiled back angelically. Cullen ignored the rest of his family, who were all watching avidly.
Cullen took a good, long look at Shannon. He was dressed in black. The dark color showcased his creamy, burgundy brown skin. The well fitting pants and silk shirt he was wearing emphasized the muscular lines of his body. He had a gold hoop in his left ear and his full lips were curved in a sexy half smile. He had an armful of red roses and held them out towards Cullen. “These are for you.”
Dazzled, unable to take his
eyes off of
“I’ll go get a vase,” she said.
The rest of the family
watched attentively as
“You look…really good,”
Quinn cleared his throat
loudly. The rest of the family shushed him but Cullen and
“Thanks,” Cullen said breathlessly.
Mary Katherine collected the roses.
“Are you ready?”
“Yeah,” Cullen replied.
Shannon put in a Seal CD and they completed the drive in a comfortable silence, enjoying the CD, a favorite for the both of them. When they arrived at the restaurant, Shannon opened the door and helped Cullen out of the car. The waiter led them over to a quiet, candlelit corner.
“Are we on a budget?” Cullen whispered.
Cullen looked at
While they viewed the menus, Shannon chuckled quietly. At Cullen’s glance of inquiry, he explained. “This reminds me of how excited we would be on your payday. Remember how you would take us all to McDonald’s?”
“How could I forget?” Cullen grumbled. Keeping his brothers and sisters and Lacey, Kai and Shannon under control had been a trip. He smiled at the memory.
“And the time we thought
Brodie had broken his arm when he was clowning around in the playroom?”
Cullen blushed and
“What?” Cullen looked at him incredulously. “You know me well enough by now to know that I don’t seriously give a fuck what other people think, right? Anytime you wanna touch me, anywhere…you just don’t get it do you? No matter what, you are always gonna be my best friend and that means everything to me.”
That wasn’t it,” he added with a shy smile. “It’s just, I’ve never had this before.” He spread his hands. “The flowers, the dinner…it’s just…never mind.”
He shifted uncomfortably. Shannon smiled and took his hand again. He smiled back.
When Cullen returned home, his mother waved him into the main house.
“I feel like I’m on MTV or something,” he complained. His brothers and sisters were waiting around the dinner table as his mother pulled him into the room.
“You’re our big brother,” Mary Katherine said.
“And this is
“Am I the only one who thinks this is strange?” Cullen asked.
“We’ve been waiting for you to wake up.” Quinn said.
“You knew?” Cullen asked.
“Cullen,” Niall said patiently. “Shannon is over here just about 24/7. You haven’t had any company in your little love nest, for at least three months, maybe closer to four or even five, hell, I don’t know exactly. I just know it’s been awhile. And…,” Niall paused dramatically before he revealed the most telling evidence. “Shannon actually rode with you on that piece of crap bike the two of you rebuilt. Now that had to be love.”
“No shit.” Quinn agreed.
“For real,” Niamh added.
“Yup,” Peggy said succinctly and suddenly the room was full the sounds of their laughter. Except for Cullen, who thought they were all crazy. Shaking his head and concerned about the sanity of his family, Cullen left the room.
A couple of nights later, Shannon invited Cullen to go out for a walk. They took the back way, walking through several alleyways to get to the park. It was so quiet that the only sounds in the night were their feet crunching on broken glass.
“I love night time,”
He took Cullen to a deserted area of the park, a hilly area where a wide expanse of the night sky was visible.
He took a deep breath and said, “After you kissed me…I couldn’t sleep. Sometimes I would come here.”
Cullen turned to
Cullen said, “I was miserable without you. I would wake up expecting to feel you next to me but you wouldn’t be there.”
“You are so beautiful. I am not just talking about your gorgeous looks and there is no mistake about that baby, you are gorgeous.”
Cullen flushed, mesmerized by the eyes looking so intently and lovingly into his.
Cullen’s eyes filled with
tears. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back, overwhelmed with emotion.
He swallowed and turned his face so that he could kiss the palm of
“Most beautiful,” he whispered.
When they returned to
“Ma, right now, I’m not thinking. I’m just letting myself feel. I don’t want to ruin it.”
Peggy looked at him worriedly, and shook her head. As he was walking down the stairs, he heard her mutter, "Damn if we could bottle that we’d be rich.”
When Cullen arrived home
from work the following Friday evening,
“Oh man, how did you know I need this? I was on the skilled wing today. None of the patients over there can walk. They’re all pretty sick.”
“I’ll take care of him,”
“I know you will, babe,” she had responded.
Cullen moaned blissfully
when Shannon started washing his hair, enjoying the fingers gently massaging
“Go lay down on the bed. I’ll be there in a sec.”
“Take those off or they’ll get oil on them. I’m gonna give you a massage.”
Cullen quickly complied.
“You’re soooo….long” he said, gazing at Cullen’s body with appreciative pleasure.
“Oh God, that feels so good.
My feet are crying. I’ve been on them for 16 hours straight,” Cullen said as
He could not deny that just looking at Cullen’s long naked muscular body made him hot. His mouth was watering. God, there was so much of him. He just wanted to explore him with his tongue, inch by inch. ‘Down, boy,’ he told himself. ‘Chill.’ He groaned silently when he reached Cullen’s small, round, muscular buttocks.
Cullen’s back was so smooth,
so broad, so silky.
“Ok, I’ll stop.” He swatted Cullen’s buttocks. “Be still.”
“Ow,” Cullen yelped. “I’m gonna get you for that. But for now, don’t stop what you’re doing,” he muttered as Shannon continued massaging his back and arms.
When he completed the back
His eyes finally lifted to
see that Cullen was watching him. He felt naked and vulnerable. For the life of
him he could not think of anything to say because the only thought
reverberating through his mind was, ‘I want you.’
Cullen was so exhausted that when Shannon was bathing him, he thought that tonight was probably the one night that he would be able to stand Shannon touching him so intimately without jumping all over him.
The bath had been sensual and comforting at the same time. The massage had started out okay, but when Shannon had playfully jumped on top of him, it had felt so good. Feeling Shannon lying on top of him triggered the memory of having Shannon’s cock in his mouth. Heavy, hard, sweet and salty.
He was fighting that memory. Because he was scared. He was confused. He was not entirely sure what Shannon wanted from him. When Shannon turned him over and he saw the look on his face, his cock grew even harder.
Cullen held himself rigid. That look made his mouth grow dry. He was sick with wanting Shannon. Every cell in his body flooded with desire. When Shannon said that he was gonna rub his feet, he had nodded his head. Feet were safe.
Only he hadn’t realized that
there must be nerve endings in his feet that connected to his cock because
“Oh God, Shannon,” he said brokenly. He rolled over and buried his face into the pillow next to him.
Alarmed, Shannon stroked his arm. Cullen shuddered.
“I want you,” Cullen yelled at him. “I want you so much that I hear the sound of your voice over the phone and I get hard. I want you so much that… I don’t know. I mean…I don’t even have the words.”
Cullen said, “I don’t know what you want from me.”
Eyes burning with hurt, angry tears, Shannon looked at him and said roughly, “Haven’t you listened to anything I’ve said to you? What do you think everything I’ve been doing over the past couple of months has been about? It’s been for you, not for me.”
Throat tight with frustration, he stopped for a brief moment then continued, “I wanted you to see how special you are to me. I want you…I want you to love me Cullen. That’s all I want. That’s all I’m asking for.”
“I’ve been trying….” Shannon’s voice broke. Minutes passed. Unsteadily, he continued, “I want you to get to know me.”
Cullen walked over to
Shannon shook his head. “You love who you think I am. You still see me as the little kid who had had a crush on you and followed you everywhere. The little kid you had to protect and take care of. That’s how you love me.”
Face taut with strain, violet eyes serious and intent, Cullen said emphatically, “You’re wrong.”
“If you knew me,”
His voice softened involuntarily, “I want you to be my best friend, my lover, my boyfriend. I can give you so much. We could have something incredible.”
“You keep throwing those words at me,” Cullen protested, stomach churning with guilt. “You’re never going to forget are you? You’re never really going to be able to forgive me.”
“I don’t think either on of us should forget it,” Shannon responded quietly. “Sometimes I think that’s all you think you’re worth. That your cock is all you have to offer.”
“You are so beautiful,”
Head back, Cullen panted for breath, heart racing with excitement and arousal. Shannon ran his hand down Cullen’s body, creating a path of chills everywhere he touched. Grasping Cullen’s achingly erect penis, he said fiercely, “You are more than this to me.”
He captured Cullen’s mouth again. His warm body pressed against Cullen’s well-oiled, muscular length.
“I want you so much,”
His words and the movement of his body against Cullen’s and months of wanting and not having pushed Cullen over the edge. His cock twitched and pulsed against Shannon’s abdomen. Agonizingly pleasurable, forceful jets of cum erupted between their bodies.
Exhausted, Cullen collapsed against him. They stumbled over to the bed. Shannon took Cullen into his arms and stared into the darkness. He had pushed too hard. What made him think that he could force Cullen into loving him, force him into a relationship? When he thought he could move without awakening Cullen, he left and went home.
Cullen had awakened. He let Shannon go without uttering a word or indicating in any way that he was no longer asleep. He lay there for interminable moments and then walked into the bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror. Over the past several months, he had been playing hide and seek with himself and he knew it. Every time he had acknowledged how important Shannon was to him, he had hidden the knowledge away from himself or minimized his feelings.
He cringed when he thought
about the many ways Shannon had opened his heart up to him, over and over and
again. Yeah, maybe sometimes he did have days where all he thought he was good
for was a good fuck. Whatever. It was time to stop acting like that little boy
who thought everybody he loved would leave him. Cullen called
“I heard you leave last night,” he said abruptly. “I know I’m a fucked up mess Shannon. Please, just be patient with me.”
Shannon sighed. “You didn’t even have to ask. I feel like I’m pushing you.”
“You’ve got it all wrong,” Cullen said. “Look, just come over for dinner tonight.”
Shannon looked around in wonder when he arrived at Cullen’s apartment later that evening. The usually cluttered space was spotless. Soft music was playing in the background and enticing scents were drifting over from the small dinette set in the corner. An amber glow filled the room.
“You didn’t eat did you?”
Cullen said ruefully, “I guess I deserve that.”
“What?” Shannon asked warily.
“You said I don’t know you, but you’re wrong. Yeah, it took me a minute to get used to the fact that my best friend isn’t a little kid anymore, but the important thing is, that the things I love about you have never changed. Your heart…big as the sky.”
Throat tight with emotion
and looking at
“I’ve been so scared, so scared to fuck this up, afraid you would leave me if I loved you too much. Here.” He thrust a small box wrapped in gold paper at Shannon. Shannon sat there, unmoving, holding the box.
“Open it,” Cullen commanded.
“You said you wanted my heart, you’ve always had that,” Cullen said in a low voice, eyes glistening. “Now you have the key too.” He put the chain around Shannon’s neck. He knelt back in front of Shannon and caressed his face gently.
“You have always been the most beautiful boy I’ve ever seen.”
“I love you so much Cullen,” he whispered.
He pulled Cullen forward and
licked the grease from his lips.
He grabbed another slice of ham and licked and kissed Cullen’s lips between bites. He fed him bits of cooked cinnamon apples and watched while Cullen licked and sucked the sauce from his fingers. Cullen continued sucking even after the syrup was gone and Shannon’s fingers were clean.
Violet eyes hot and intent
on Shannon’s, Cullen kissed his palm and then slowly slid his tongue across his
hand. He shifted his weight on Shannon’s hardening cock.
Shannon licked his lips. His cock flexed urgently beneath Cullen.
“You like that? Cullen
asked, voice low and husky with need, as he took one of Shannon’s fingers into
his mouth and sucked on it gently. Shannon nodded his head. Cullen nipped at
his finger, took it from his mouth and started sucking on another.
“That’s how I wanna suck your cock.”
“Do you remember how it felt when I sucked your cock?” Cullen whispered hoarsely.
“You taste sooo sweet.” Cullen murmured.
“God, you taste like heaven.”
“Kiss me,” he begged.
Cullen opened his mouth and
He licked and nibbled on
Shannon’s nipples. Shannon’s body was suffused with electricity at the contact
and he emitted a harsh, throaty groan. With hot, moist lips, Cullen kissed his
way delicately across Shannon’s body until he was on his knees in front of him.
Cullen rubbed his face back and forth against
They undressed each other
tenderly, between languid, unhurried kisses.
“That can be arranged.”
Cullen said with a wicked smile.
“I have been dreaming about
this for a long time,”
He ran a hand lightly across
Cullen’s penis. Every muscle in Cullen’s body tightened and his hands flexed,
then gripped the sheets beneath him.
“Don’t,” Cullen said through gritted teeth. “I won’t be able to last.”
“Oh my God.”
Cullen screamed hoarsely, “I…I’m gonna cum. I can’t stop it.”
He placed his hands on
Cullen collapsed backwards
onto the bed, pulling Shannon towards him and kissing him passionately. He
kissed his way across
Cullen looked up at
“This is where I want to be,” he said hoarsely, adding another finger while grabbing lube from the nightstand.
“I’ve been waiting for so
long, I can’t wait. Don’t make me wait, Cullen,”
Cullen moved over him,
lifting his legs so that they were on his shoulders. He looked into
“Oh God, Cullen.”
Cullen stared into his
“Cullen you feel so good
inside of me,”
Cullen felt as if he would
never catch his breath. His voice clogged in his throat, he was on sensory
overload. Being inside of
“If I what?” Shannon asked breathlessly, moving his hips sinuously up and back down again.
“Oh God,” Cullen said
through gritted teeth. He held
“Wait. Don’t move,” he commanded.
“I can’t help it,”
And then he made that sound, that sweet, anguished hungry whimper that drove Cullen crazy.
Cullen lost control. He
"Cullen, don’t stop that feels so good. Don’t stop, don’t stop. Cullen fuck me.”
Cullen climaxed in an explosion of love and lust.
“Cum with me,” he entreated,
plunging his aching cock in and out of
“Cum with me.”
He wrapped his arms around
“I love you, I love you, I
love you,” he moaned over and over, overwhelmed with emotion and his need for
Cullen collapsed onto
“You’re mine,” Cullen said fiercely, “and I am NEVER letting you go.”
He reached between them and
pulled at the key around
Shannon lay beneath him
quietly, heart too full to speak. Cullen rolled onto his back and settled
“Look at me,” he said to
“You know me,” Cullen said gently. “What do you see?”
“You have the ‘this ought
“What else?” Cullen asked.
“Say it,” Cullen said tenderly. “Please,” he added.